Trouty Mouth and the make-believe Glee club…

17 Mar

I remember music lessons back at the Gleed Girls School in Spalding… they were awesome! Me and my friends would have KILLED to join a Glee club back then, as at least there would’ve been some official entity to blame for the fact that we walked around singing at every opportunity, like a bunch of irritating try-hard drama school drop outs.

Me and my friends Beth, Sarah, Alison and Lesley wouldn’t shut up. Look at us going for it in that photo up there! We’d sing in Geography, harmonise in History, duet in French and compose musical numbers about memories in Maths. Looking back, we’d actually formed our very own make-believe Glee club. We just didn’t know it.

At one point I got kicked out of the assembly room for singing numerous musical numbers into a microphone, on the stage, on my own. The Religious Ed teacher came storming in through the double doors, just as I reached the penultimate line in my medley, complaining that my voice was echoing around the ENTIRE school. I wasn’t embarrassed. I was glad.

Once, our English class was assigned the task of writing a poem, which is difficult enough for an easily  distracted 15 year old who just wants to go home and smoke a cigarette, and listen to Take That. Not for us though. Pppppfff, that wasn’t enough of a challenge for me and my friends.

We composed an entire musical masterpiece involving the guitar, the violin and the cello. When it was done, we stood up in front of the whole class and sang a rather complicated three part harmony over rhyming words we’d written about the first world war. I remember our English teacher’s mouth gaping open like a goldfish. When we’d finished there was total silence. Then, with a dramatic swish of her skirt she marched straight past us and out of the room, rushing back in five minutes later with the headmistress. She demanded we perform it again. Simon Cowell would have wept – we were AMAZING.

Of course, everyone else hated our guts. Their shitty poems didn’t get a look in. They didn’t even try and involve a tamborine. Losers.

Anyway… I just LOVE this song from the latest episode of Glee. Obviously it hasn’t aired yet in Australia but it’s all over YouTube – thank God they’re finally doing some original songs, like we did (pah!) It’s got attitude and oomph and is just a tiny bit wrong. I would have loved to pen an insulting song like Trouty Mouth back at the Gleed and sing it to the people who annoyed me. Mind you, the fact that I used to sing all the time anyway was probably quite insulting to most people, looking back… (ahem)

Watching Glee makes me want to be back at school again. Why didn’t we have this show back then?? Oh, and also, as our good friend Perez Hilton pointed out yesterday, a show like Glee would have changed lives for gay teens back then, too, living in the closet or just miserable that they weren’t accepted or understood. Ah well, at least we have it now huh, so kids all over the world can feel good about being EXACTLY who they are, and crash their school assembly halls and English poetry assignments with pride. GO GLEE!

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